Sunday, March 18, 2012

The trials and tribulations of my blue funk days

Friday, March 16

Total gross profits
:  $-50.00  -1.00 ES points
Total trades:  5 [1 scratch]
Accuracy:  50.0%
Execution score: 20%  [ughhhh...]
Opportunity cost: $75.00  +1.50 ES points  [minimal due to limited range day?]

I spent this weekend reading up about and thinking of ways to improve my mental game.  It's pretty clear that for whatever reasons, the discipline that worked so well for me nearly the first couple weeks of this month, all of a sudden vanished earlier last week and the blue funk days quickly appeared.  In some ways, perhaps I was lucky that we only had a +4.75 range during RTH on Friday, which may have slowed down my trading.

So I tried to brainstorm an introspective, root cause type analysis, to determine what may have triggered the recent lapse in discipline:

  • I might do better when I have a swing trade position, since it makes me feel like I'm already involved/participating in something -- I'm less likely to impulse/revenge trade
  • Less sleep means I'm less likely to remain alert and disciplined.  At least my little kids are finally starting to sleep all through the night [FINGERS CROSSED]
  • I haven't been exercising as much -- this is a big factor for my mental well
  • Diet -- too much sugar wipes me out.  I need to have a breakfast and lunch "tuned" to keep me mentally sharp
  • I still have moments of profound sadness about my mom passing away last month
  • Over the past 5 months since trading futures, it feel like I've been treading water...
  • I want that "breakaway" where I'm "making the turn", and I end up forcing trades/going for home runs
  • There are times when I think my "subconscious trader" wants a chance at proving itself, but that also opens up the door for "Gambler Grove"
  • When the first trade is a loss, and especially after first 2 in a row, revenge mentality sets in
  • Something else I'm blocking deep within my subconscious?
Even if I know knew the exact trigger(s), I'm sure it'll still be quite the challenge to get it under control.  Just like the time the doctor told me to cut the coffee for a while...oh how I failed.  I didn't even seriously attempt it.  

If I specifically knew what factor was the root cause of my trading issues, you better believe I'd be giving it 110% effort to crush it so that I gain consistent self-control.  I realize I'm still getting started on my journey, but I believe more than ever that with every day of experience I gain, it only makes me stronger.

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